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“I have woken up drunk more often than I care to admit and I have no good stories about it at all because I don’t remember a lot of stuff that happens when I’m hammered. Morning drunk is the same as night drunk except that the sun is out. Day drunk is a different kind of beast altogether and superior in every way to both morning and night drunk. I love getting day drunk and then going to bed at like 9 PM and waking up not drunk, but with a suitable amount of sleep to recover from the bulk of the hangover. It’s simply the best of all drunks.

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